American Girl in Italy

How does the blue mold get in Gorgonzola? Have you ever heard the rocks at Castiglioncello sing and why do writers always seek solace in Italy? Time for me to find the answers to these and see, if in doing so, I also find my home.

My Photo
Name: ~Sparrow
Location: Rome, RM, Italy

i am actually the lost royal heir to the small kingdom of Birundi...having been secreted away by my wet nurse when mean overlords arrived turning our little known, yet terribly chic fiefdom into a nasty republic. now my people sit glued with their eyes glazed.....dreaming of distant IRA's and stock options, having long forgotten the taste of sweet green olive oil and the scent of rosemary.

28 September 2008

I adoped a vine...

Yes, I know, it seems nuts, but there is a method to my madness, you just have to drink a whole lot of wine to understand.

I've adopt'd a grape

11 September 2008

In the world of on-line dating


....I think I would be like this Koala.

Reported as being so feisty she once swatted at one suitor while turning a cold shoulder to another, Killarney seems to have a lot of my same social awkwardness when it comes to dating or meeting someone you like for the first time. In fact, she is so difficult to tame that her zookeepers have resorted to an internet dating site in the hopes of finding a Mr. Koala who will love her for all her strengths while still having enough room in his heart to overlook her I-haven't-had-enough-eucalyptus-leaves faults.

Maybe.....maybe...if her handlers are lucky, they will find her a mate who flips her switch enough to want to stay partnered for life.

Yet Australia is full of Koala's and its hard for Killarney to know which of her potential dates really will love her for her big nose and pear shaped body and which dudes only want to add another notch on their tree trunk. Heck, seems that some Marsupial males, like their human counterparts, seem only interested in collecting females for their harem.

In the end, Killarney isn't really looking for anything all that unreasonable or complicated. She's not the type to steal his stash of shoots, nor is she such a pushy broad that she would demand that he stay by her side 24/7, in fact she kinda prefers some quite time by herself to think higher Koalaian thoughts. But it would be nice for her to have a soft bear to snuggle with in the tree at night, someone to hold her paw when she's worried and that she can exchange ideas with. She's really just looking for a fella who will make her smile.

Funny, I never realized Koala females were my totem animal.

Because when it comes to menfolk in the 21st century, I am usually much better at knowing and understanding the rules of friendship than those that apply to dating.

22 August 2008

An artist's approach....

What happens when you give a man a paintbrush and a worthy cause. This one is for all my artistic friends and all you hardworking gals trying to make a difference at FAO and Action Aid International.

21 August 2008

The Surgeon

As warriors of love
Like small children with rolled up pant legs, We could compare our scrapes and scars.

Some deep and permanent,
others fresh
that we pick at absentmindedly.

"I'll show you mine if you'll show me yours!" I'd taunt.
Suggesting that perhaps we could suture frayed vessels with fine laughter instead of catgut.

I wonder, as a practiced surgeon,
scalpel in hand,
what you would think,
peering inside the bisected map of my world?

If I allowed you to open me from navel to chin.

Would you gaze like a thoughtful mechanic, working under the hood of an old roadster?

I can almost see you shaking your head
with brow knitted as you poked and prodded my wet and purple heart.
Noting with precision,
each crack and fissure.
Of the times I failed to perform the proper maintenance and allowed her to be broken.

And if I let you probe deeper,
would you thoughtfully untangle the wire, the bad sewing of my sincere and botched attempts to mend and gird.

And would you knowingly understand
that I had done the best I could, under the circumstances.

Just so that I could slip and fall and love again and again and again.

Maybe you could make me famous.
as the focus of some less than dry medical treatise:
having properly diagnosed the reason why my brain shuts off conveniently when my body needs to find its own solace or why what little faculty and reason I seem to possess conveniently escapes like butterflies through an open window each time that I have looked love in the eyes.

If you do, I will send you long letters of thanks smiling when you are published in JAMA.

So trustingly I let you trace this line with your thoughtful fingers tenderly touching upon the paths of my self inflicted bruising.

And as your tears splash upon my navel forming salty trails where once I sought your kisses I am not surprised that you let the shiny scalpel fall to the floor.

Knowing,
without making a single cut
knowing,
like the good doctor Luke
knowing,
that first one needs to heal oneself.

16 August 2008

Repeating Themes

In the last weeks and months I have watched a subtle revival of thought developing in my steamy Roma. A repetition of themes, some old and time honored, others less so and its something that has finally driven me from my heat induced blog slumber in a way nothing else has been able to.

As summer approached, and with the precision of a Swiss Army watch or the ringing bells in the campanile above the church on my street, the Roman collective as in countless years past, has been inexplicably pulled, like bits of metal towards a giant magnet, to the subject of where everyone was going for their summer holidays.

Throughout the summer, the conversations weave and bob, but always surrounding this particular theme and a day doesn't pass where at least one of my Italian-born friends can be heard saying "Ufa!....the city is so hot...I cannot wait until I go [INSERT BEACH ISLAND RESORT OF YOUR PREFERENCE HERE] where I can finally relax and cool off."

Listening to them, I find it increasingly hard not to giggle. Because for the most part, most of us have already ceased to do much of anything in the 40 degree heat.

Damp and sweating, we look for whatever shade we can, eat gelato by the kilo and even die-hard red wine drinkers switch to whites. In an effort to stay cool, even the simplest of mundane tasks can seem like too much to drag us out of our collective heatwave induced coma. Hot, sticky, and miserable our brains are already in summer slug mode and there is little if any profoundly intellectual or challenging work going on at all.

Yet, as predictably as those "Christmas in Bla Bla Bla" movies released every December can be, the season's conversations flow along the same inevitable riverbanks. Year after sweaty year, sooner or later I receive the predictable follow-up question of where I too am going for the summer holidays.

Playfully and as usual, I mess with the status quo.

I watch with humor as certain acquantences all but twitch when I tell them that for as long as I have lived in Italy, I haven't seen the need to bask like so many lizards on a hot sandy beach with 2 million of my closest lizard friends.

And in defensive reflex, it is usually at this point where I receive their annual scolding,

"Aaah but you must slow down.....everyone needs to relax...have you considered going to the mountains instead?"

Yet, each year my responses earn me varying degrees of horrified looks, sometimes even total incomprehension when I explain to them that "Yes, surely they are correct, I should slow down and enjoy life more but not this year".

To shake things up a bit, this year I have told them that I plan to work extra hard this July and August so that can have the time in late October to follow the vendemmia and to work with friends during this year's crush.

Usually it is at this point in the conversation that most people who don't know me well, begin to think that I am certifiably fuori come un balcone.

But this isn't the repeating theme that I want to talk about today, nor is it what has brought me out of months of blogger hibernation on a steamy Saturday afternoon.

The breeze that is blowing is more sinister, and one that increasingly scares and disappoints me.

Fascism.

Always just under the surface, even in Rome's young neo-right youth who are too young to recall the atrocities committed in its name here in Italy, I am horrified to see it creeping out, loudly and boldly, outwardly accepted by so many seemingly normal people, Italian and foreigner alike.

Silvio Berlusconi and his xenophobic henchmen Interior Minister, Roberto Maroni, in the Northern League, have begun issuing a draconian series of measures aimed at illegal immigrants, beggars and gypsies -- all under the guise of that increasingly sinister word "security".

No different that the United States and its civil rights violating Homeland Security rules implemented in the name of stamping our the spread of terrorism, Italy has begun fingerprinting all Rom children.

Citing violent crimes, the rule has more to do with Romania's Rumeni (Romanians) and its place within the EU than the Rom people, who have lived in Italy since the 14th century.

Fuelled by yellow journalism and paranoia about security in general, the new rules have overtones that would make Benito Mussolini proud.

With Italian nationalism and xenophobia becoming more and more paranoid the politically powerful blame the country's painful recession on foreigners, seeing them as both rivals for jobs and scapegoats for the country's social ills despite there being statistically no connection whatsoever.

In a nation whose Fascist rulers once helped the Nazis deport Jews and gypsies during the Second World War, the fingerprinting is only one of many new measure being implimented to fight a phantom problem.

3,000 troops have been dispatched to guard railway stations and tourist spots. And judging by the responses I hear every day, the soldiers have won the hearts and minds of the commuting classes.

At a security screening at the last train stop on the way to Ostia, I watched with irritation, as soldiers asked for the documents of everyone in line who was a person of color. Redheaded and presumably Irish, I was allowed to pass, without being stopped for questioning, as every dark haired and dark skinned coconut salesman or tired umbrella seller was shaken down.

Why is this happening and if it isn't racially motivated, why were the Italians and presumed tourists excluded?

As frighteningly frustrating as witnessing this ethnic hatred was, I was shocked further in retelling the tale when the American expat I was speaking with stated that he believed that the stops were necessary. An American!!!!! How does amnesia of this kind set in and didn't we have our own civil rights movement outlawing this type of discrimination 50 years ago?????

With my mouth open...I remind anyone who reads this blog to remember this poem.

Original
Als die Nazis die Kommunisten holten,
habe ich geschwiegen;
ich war ja kein Kommunist.

Als sie die Sozialdemokraten einsperrten,
habe ich geschwiegen;
ich war ja kein Sozialdemokrat.

Als sie die Gewerkschafter holten,
habe ich nicht protestiert;
ich war ja kein Gewerkschafter.

Als sie die Juden holten,
habe ich geschwiegen;
ich war ja kein Jude.

Als sie mich holten,
gab es keinen mehr, der protestieren konnte.
When the Nazis came for the communists,
I remained silent;
I was not a communist.

When they locked up the social democrats,
I remained silent;
I was not a social democrat.

When they came for the trade unionists,
I did not speak out;
I was not a trade unionist.

When they came for the Jews,
I remained silent;
I wasn't a Jew.

When they came for me,
there was no one left to speak out.

"First they came…" is a poem attributed to Pastor Martin Niemöller (1892–1984) about the inactivity of German intellectuals following the Nazi rise to power and the purging of their chosen targets, group after group. An early supporter of Hitler, by 1934 Niemöller had come to oppose the Nazis, and it was largely his high connections to influential and wealthy businessmen that saved him until 1937 wen he was eventually imprisoned at the Dachau concentration camp.

05 May 2008

When English isn't expressive enough......

Jovanotti ha scritto proprio una bella canzone... più che altro ha scritto delle belle parole.

Non so perchè tutto sia difficile... ma so che lo è sempre stato. E più che il tempo passa e più che le cose diventano difficili. Non so cosa succederà in futuro. Nessuno può saperlo. Ma so che ho anche vissuto delle cose meravigliose che nessuno potrà mai rubarmi.

06 February 2008

Everyone's Muse

Writers, performers, artists, dreamers.....we each draw inspiration from somewhere. Couched in poetry, music, or neoclassic snapshots, we are each trying to say what our mouths often cannot express so eloquently, wrapping our feelings in brightly colored ribbons, monochrome steel boxes, or rainbow colored humor.

People ask me "Is this based on someone you know?" and I answer glibbly "Yes, vaguely, it's based upon a friend I knew when I lived in Zanzibar", politely sidestepping further probes about my black sheep past. Soon enough they will move on to mind-numbing boring talks about how turquoise the water is in East African archipelagos and the true protagonist of my words remains my secret.

It doesn't bother us when our acquaintances are fooled. Sometimes we prefer their naiveté. It keeps us from having to spill the skeletons from our protective closets exposing our naked muses for prying eyes to see.

But when we share something we have created with a loved one, and they fail to recognize themselves in our painful shyness, when we can only speak obliquely, the wounds of their oversight are crushing on the soul. It is as if their blindness has the ability to makes razor thin cuts over and over again, crosshatched up and down upon our psyche. Looking into their eyes, we search, furtively, hungrily, then angrily, desperately, for some small acknowledgment, a glimmer of insight, that gives us hope, and helps us to believe that they really do understand and perhaps love us enough to see through our fictional characters.

Until we finally give up and stop trying.

Our truest friends will read our words, hear our music, or watch our movies, played out like a passion play, and know instantly that there is something more here than just pretty thoughts strung together like colorful pearls.

They are the ones who cry with us, wrapping us in their warming coats when we mistakenly seek acceptance in sugar cubed glasses of peridot colored absinthe. Sometimes they just listen, patiently on cell phones while standing on noisy streets or quietly as the sun comes up, half the world and an ocean away.

I often wonder why it is that that so few can hear what isn't said, see what isn't shown, read between unwritten lines. What gift do they possess that allows them to sense in us something familiar, touching it, finding it beautiful, no matter how vulnerable, no matter how scarred, no matter how naked a soul can be.

E non riuscire ad incontrarsi in mezzo,
e l’orgoglio ci impedisce di
uscire allo scoperto.

Quanto è più facile dare la colpa a te,
perché non sopporto il peso di
guardare quel che c’è

dentro me….

E non potere ritornare indietro,
quanto è alto da pagare il prezzo
per quello che abbiam detto

Far finta sempre che niente sia successo,
ma la volta dopo è sempre peggio
e non troviamo il verso..

Fai un passo anche tu
ed io 1 in più.
Non importa chi ha ragione sai,
non stiamo bene mai.
Fai un passo anche tu
ed io 1 in più.
Non rimane troppo tempo ormai
e il male, gratis, non guarisce mai.

Rabbia e rancore non sono parole,
fucili spianati,
trincea di dolore.

E come l’acqua va via fra le dita,
in un batter d’occhio,
la vita è fuggita.

Fai un passo anche tu
ed io 1 in più.
Non importa chi ha ragione sai,
non stiamo bene mai.
Fai un passo anche tu
ed io 1 in più.
Non rimane troppo tempo ormai
e il male, gratis, non guarisce mai.

Wine and well...more wine.

OK many people have commented on why I haven't blogged in a dogs age but the fact of the matter is Life interrupted. First surgery, with nasty overtones of pending doom which thankfully have turned out to be less dire and then a boo koo of writing work and personal angst that has kept my creative pen less than dry.

To change that I am adding two links. One, to my most recent wine article, which aside from some HTML problems...I like a lot.

A Multitude of Zins


The second is to toot the horn of a fellow wine aficionado and colleague Gary Vaynerchuk. Gary tilts at the wine world's windmills reminding folks that wine is about taste and not about pretentiousness. His motto is “You, with a little bit of me… we’re changing the wine world.”

If you haven't seen him setting the wine world on end, take a look. He tapes almost daily and aside from actually being reachable by e-mail, he's bound to make you smile. I like his style because like me, he reminds you that drinking wine is about enjoying yourself, not about being pretentious.

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